


Endor Night

by Azalea_Scroggs



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Original Trilogy
Genre: Canon Compliant, Father-Son Relationship, Gen, Introspection, POV Second Person, Return of the Jedi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-13
Updated: 2019-04-13
Packaged: 2020-01-11 19:49:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,467
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18430910
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Azalea_Scroggs/pseuds/Azalea_Scroggs
Summary: On a small sanctuary moon, a Rebel comes to surrender to Darth Vader. The short conversation they have before the young man is taken away leaves the Dark Lord of the Sith distraught and lost in his thoughts. A son's anxious hope and a father's conflict entwine under the night sky, their deepest doubts and desires engulfed by the soothing noises of the forest.(Written in 2015)





	1. Luke

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first Star Wars fanfiction I've ever written, that I'm bringing over from fanfiction.net. Since then, my understanding of the characters as well as my writing style has evolved a lot, but there it is anyway. I hope you enjoy.

Your pace is steady and careful, neither slow nor quick, as you walk between the trees. There is no path ahead of you, and your whole concentration goes on the movements of your feet, so that you won't trip and fall.

An eerie quietness reigns all around you. The only sounds you hear are the soft rustle of the branches, murmuring things no one can understand, and your steps muffled by the carpet of dead leaves. The canopy is so thick, here, you can't even see the stars above your head. Obscurity envelops you, and you rely on the Force more than on your eyes to go forward. It is as though the entire moon was holding its breath, waiting to see destiny unfold. 

You don't dwell on these thoughts, though, letting them fly away from you as you repeatedly put one foot in front of the other. Your heart is beating loud and fast in your ears. You try your best not to think, to connect with the life around you and stay in the present. Your peace is fragile, a facade you feel could be shattered by the simple brush of an unwelcome idea against your mind. _I have to do this,_ you tell yourself as a mantra, to keep you going. _There is no other way. I must save him._

A face lingers in your memories, of a young woman holding her tears. Her pleas to make you stay haunt you, so does the feeling of your hand slipping from hers despite both of your wills. You nearly wish you'd listened to her. You didn't want to let go, to leave your sister and her duty for what could turn out to be a suicide mission. But you know your fate doesn't lie with her, nor with the Alliance's impeding attack. Tonight, your task requires a different kind of bravery.

A dark presence hovers at the edge of your senses, the same that has been pursuing you relentlessly since your arrival. Your father... it is still strange to call him that way, but you must embrace the notion completely if you are to succeed. He is expecting you, you can feel anticipation swirl in him. And you have no other choice than to grant him his wish. He would burn down the entire forest to lay his hands on you, knowing you are there, just out of his grasp. Such is his obsession with you...

A shiver runs through your spine. Despite your best efforts, you are frightened by the intensity with which he wants you. You know there can be no escape from that single-mindedness, and it makes you feel trapped, small and helpless.

You remember what you told Leia, earlier in the evening. _There is still good in him. I know I can bring him back._ There wasn't any hesitation in your words then, nor when you confronted Ben about it on Dagobah. Ever since you have been able to consider the events of Bespin without wincing in pain or in shame, you have recalled the flicker of light that sparked when he begged you not to make him destroy you, when he extended his hand to you.

Now though, in the darkest of night, your certainty begins to falter. Fear is slowly gripping at your heart, as you wonder what will happen if you are wrong. You still know what you felt then, you still believe what you glimpsed through his armour was genuine, but you can no longer ignore the fact that it could just as well be mere wishful fantasies, created by your tormented mind to help you cope with the truth of a horrific heritage. Ben told you there was nothing left of Anakin Skywalker, Leia looked at you as though you were mad; you are the only one who hopes.

After all, you don't really know anything about your father. You are convinced he doesn't desire your death, but nothing else. And he did such terrible things in the past, it would be foolish to think he will no longer harm you. How far will he be willing to go to convince you to join him? How much torment will he subject you to, to bring you where he wants? And, if the Emperor orders him to finish you off, when you reject the dark side once and for all, how can you be so sure he won't obey? Your overactive imagination conjures a hundred dreadful images you cannot shake.

Yet you know you won't be able to strike him down.

You stumble on a root, nearly avoid to fall, and you are forced to stop, your tight composure slipping away. All your cautious efforts to keep your breathing slow and deep vanish into the wind, and your guts constrict painfully as your nervousness rises unhindered. You cannot face him like that, not when your doubts are taking the better of you, not when you are questioning everything you are doing. You cannot afford to be unsure or you will be swallowed whole. 

But how do you stay calm, when you are about to leave everything behind and abandon yourself to the enemy's clutches, to face your possible death, or worse?

Waves of terror and despair overwhelm you. _I can't do it,_ you think. You are just a little farmboy from a backwater planet. You are no match for a Dark Lord of the Sith who has done that kind of thing since before you were born, you aren't fitted to take that pressure and that strain, to bear that burden thrown on you by surprise.

Life is whirling and rippling in your surroundings, but you have never felt so alone, so scared.

You try to regain the Jedi serenity you have managed to display until now, but it is of no use. Your hands won't stop shaking. There is so much at stake and you don't feel ready. You are making the riskiest bet of your existence. You are blindly throwing yourself to the wolves, with your faith and hope as only protection, and you aren't even sure it is the right thing to do. You feel the weight of the future on your shoulders, see a thousand possibilities flow around your senses. You are more conscious than ever of your lungs filling up with air before emptying themselves, of the grass' and the plants' smell, of the Force swirling in your surroundings. You take it all in, revelling in it, for tonight may be the last time.

Desperate, you reach out to the Force, begging it to help you, to show you another way, to keep you safe and away from everything. You want nothing more than to forget and escape the trials set before you, so close and menacing. But inside, you know this is not to be, and it only confirms it to you. You have to continue, whatever destiny has in store for you. It is too late to go back now.

Again, you slightly touch your father's presence. Its darkness is warm and alluring, it whispers compellingly to your mind, waiting for you. _Come to me._

And his eagerness to possess you at last reminds you of your goal. Your determination strengthens again. If someone can free him from his prison of blackness, then you are the one with this power. You may not be the more skilled Jedi ever trained, you may have cracks and weaknesses in every corner of your being, but you are his son, and that is your greatest asset. You are possibly the very last person he cares for, the only one capable to see through him, to reach for him, to mend his ravaged soul. You have to do this for him, and you promise you won't fail him.

The vow gives you the confidence you needed. Supported by the gentle and peaceful murmur of the Force, you begin to walk again.

Too soon, you see the lights of an Imperial garrison in front of you. For a tiny moment more, you hesitate, reluctant to give up your freedom. You have been evading capture for so long now that surrender goes against your every instinct. A last sparkle of fear flares in you, quickly stifled.

You won't run away. You are aware that there is a good chance you will not survive this encounter, and you have accepted it. You know what you must do.

Tonight, you will hand yourself over to your father. You will bring him back to you, or die trying.


	2. Vader

The doors of the elevator close off, leaving you alone on the platform, deeply troubled. Everything is calm around you: night has enshrouded your surroundings. Over your own loud breath, you only hear the slumbering whisper of the leaves in the wind and the creaking of Imperial transports.

You gaze upon the lightsabre you are still holding in your robotic hand. Similar to your own, once, long ago... That time is gone, lost in a distant past, yet it seems to catch up with you despite all your efforts.

You take some irritated steps that reverberate in the silence. You feel the presence of the young man who just disappeared behind you, but his emotions are carefully hidden beyond your perception. Your short discussion with him plays endlessly in your mind, bringing back a world of unwelcome memories. That quiet assurance walking straight into the lion's den, those deep and sharp eyes, those words he boldly addressed you... Everything in his demeanour reminds you of old, blessed years you'd rather forget all about.

Anger slowly rises in you, but you do nothing to hold it back. It numbs your senses, amplifies your strength.

How you hate that all too familiar face! How you loathe that naive, serene certainty, that determination to take you down a path you've violently rejected! You can't wait for the morning sun to rise. You will then take the boy to your master, and watch with an immense satisfaction the Emperor crush all of his silly beliefs, shatter his stubborn spirit into pieces, break him and tear him apart –

And yet the thought of your son enduring your master's wrath makes your insides tighten. You wish he was easier to reason with. You want him to finally take his rightful place at your side, where he should have been all these years. But that doesn't seem to be his opinion. You've never felt such resolve, such faith before : it captivates and frightens you. With that attitude, he will most certainly be dead before even considering to give up... The thought exhales a shiver along the remains of your limbs. That isn't what you want.

In a sudden surge of fury, you set a tree nearby on fire, combining the might of the Force and your own resentful despair. Haven't you been punished already? Wasn't it enough to see everyone you cared for cruelly ripped from you one after the other? Wasn't it enough to be reduced to a scorched mess, burnt and charred, forever trapped in an iron cage that brings you pain every hour of your life?

It has been more than twenty years since that fatal day, you realize, while watching the tree lit up like a torch. More than twenty years of going on day after day, revelling sordidly in your newfound abilities. The Force bends to your will like your fearful legions. Your domination is absolute, worlds bowing down at your smallest whim. Your hours are filled with the screams of the enemies your torture, with the agonising gasps of the officers that failed you. You take a destructive and hollow satisfaction in making others pay for what you have lost. Never has any shadow of doubt lingered on your actions. You are strong, they are weak, and that's it.

But even that, now, is being taken away from you. Since the boy's appearance, your strength is cracking apart.

He revives wounds in your chest you'd thought long healed, summons emotions you'd deemed buried forever. He awakens a part of you that disconcerts you and that you've never truly understood. He obsesses you, haunts you. His words, despite their inanity, manage to strike a chord deep within you, to stir an insufferable yearning you didn't know you harboured. You desire nothing more than see him stand next to you, know him, understand his mind's mechanisms. You want to darken his bright but so vulnerable light, mould it into something stronger. You want to show him the true nature of the Force, to guide him in this exhilarating power. You want to hold him and possess him, make him yours entirely, son and apprentice.

But he refuses you, eludes you endlessly. Even as a prisoner, his soul escapes your grasp, and this resistance hurts you more than you care to admit. So you struggle to hate him, you turn your anger against him, you persuade yourself you desire his destruction, but even those weapons that usually serve you so well are nearly inefficient against him. You feel frustrated, helpless, like the apprentice you once were.

For the first time, you hesitate. You question yourself, you realize you don't like the decision his stubbornness forces you to make. You think of his peaceful face, of his senseless promises, of his foolish hopes. An iron grip clenches your useless lungs.

For the first time, you realize you still have something to lose.

The fire looks like spreading to the neighbouring plants, a gesture of your hand suffocates it, condemning it in mere seconds. You don't really feel like seeing the Empire's formidable technology reduced to ashes. Of the tree, all that's left is a couple of smoking fragments.

You quickly come back to reality, and your moment of reluctance fills you with shame. Your son's efforts are admirable but vain. You know you have no place in his delusions. You are more damaged than he thinks : a broken, mutilated creature, detested and despised. You aren't even sure whether you're still human. It's been such a long time since you fell to the Dark Side, you no longer know anything else. The darkness is too strong for you to withstand its intoxicating appeal, and to tell the truth, you have no desire to renounce it. Your power and your allegiance to the Emperor are all you have left, you are a Sith Lord and intend to remain so. You wish he will eventually understand and join you; you will do anything to convince him.

Yes, Luke is wrong. Your destiny has been written for a long time, and by coming to you, he sealed his. You know what you must do.

Tomorrow you will bring the boy to your master. He will turn, or he will die.


End file.
